These feet belong to my beautiful one-year old daughter. She is an amazing gift, along with our three-year old son, but my idealism is coming into major conflict these days with the reality of parenting young children.I kind-of, sort-of thought parenting would be this utopia of family life where enough love made for a world of laughter and joy. Well love gets tested between tantrums, teething, and total chaos in our cozy little home. For a guy who tends to like things a bit cleaner, a bit more orderly, this is not utopia.
But the hardest part, to be honest, is the sense of isolation we feel as we work our hardest to provide a stable environment for our kids. Much of what we've read about parenting is that you need to know your child, and respond to his/her cues, especially noting when they're tired or overstimulated. As a result, we've tried to emphasize regular naps at home, which leaves us confined to the house for the better part of the day. Our social life has gone down the drain, and it's challenging enough for both of us to get to church at times. Are we doing something wrong? Or is this just a phase of life? Maybe as I write this it's partly a cry for help for someone out in cyberspace to sympathize with us in this crazy time of life. We would love to make more time for our friends (you know who you are), but find the days go so quickly, and the years from there on. I'm trying to stay connected, to God, my wife, my friends, and even myself. Journaling is definitely a helpful start, but if you care to respond, I'd love it.
I ask for more of God's Spirit, more peace, and for guidance to the places of connection I need for my soul's health.
